Quinn’s Diary & Essays

Quinn’s Diary: The Pattern Is the Proof

Personal entries written in real time, while Quinn was still trying to understand what was happening.

You Can’t Stop Thinking About Them. The Question Is Who Built the Obsession.

How to tell whether you’re grieving a fantasy or surviving manipulation.

Trauma Bonds: The Pull Is Real

Fifty-eight days out, and the reasons I left have started to sound small.

I Know the 7 Stages of Getting Back Together. I’ve Run Them Three Times.

A Love Letter to a Man Who Doesn’t Exist

I Wasn’t Addicted to Him. I Was Addicted to the Relief.

What I Miss, and Why That Doesn’t Mean I Was Wrong to Leave

Leaving Wasn’t the End. It Was the Beginning of a Different Kind of Control.

It Gave Me the Ick. Here’s Why That Matters.

When Leaving Becomes a Crisis: What the Abused Partner Owes

You Don’t Leave When You’re Ready. You Leave When You Can’t Stay.

You Didn’t Push Him Away. You Reacted to Being Pushed.

I Never Thought He Would Hurt Me Physically

The Version of Me He Needs Me to Be

I Make His Plate First

He Said All the Right Things. My Body Still Didn’t Believe Him.

The Law Finally Caught Up

Canada’s Supreme Court just put a name to what he was doing to you.

He Needed You Broken

Living with someone who needs you to stay distressed.

Why You Said Yes When You Meant No

Why innocent people confess and why abuse survivors understand it better than anyone.

The Double Bind

Explaining made you guilty. Silence made you guilty. Welcome to the trap.

The Night I Called for Help to Leave

I called the police so I could leave my own home.

What You Were Really Searching For

I started googling his behavior to make sense of it and what you’re actually looking for.

Why Leaving Isn’t Simple

Why it’s so hard to leave emotional abuse, even when you know you should.